Yes lord cigarette, you will be the first thing I think about in the mornings, and the last
thing I think of before going to bed.
Yes lord cigarette, I will spend up to $200.00 a month on you, even though I know my
children could use new clothes, and that there are struggling preachers out there who
could use the money.
Yes lord cigarette, I will hand over my health and my strength to you, even my life if
necessary.
Yes lord cigarette, I will take you with me everywhere I go. I will never leave the house
without you, lest I need you, and you not be there.
Yes lord cigarette, I will love you more than my family, friends, and neighbors. Even
when it offends them, I will continue to turn faithfully to you. And even if it harms their
health, I will not cease clinging to you.
Yes lord cigarette, I will gladly be seen purchasing you, and smoking you, even if it does
appear as being evil to some people, you and I know how good you make me feel.
Therefore, I will not despise you, not even in the meeting house yard and parking lot. I
want the world to know how devoted I am to you.
Yes lord cigarette, I will sometimes leave you laying around the house so that my
children, out of their curiosity, might give you a try when I’m not looking. Then, perhaps
you will become their lord too.
Yes lord cigarette, you are my master, I am your slave. You will always come first in life,
above all others.
Yes lord cigarette, the Bible says to abstain from every appearance of evil (1 Thess. 5:22),
and that I should not be brought under the power of (addicted to) anything (1 Corinthians
6:12). And I do care about what the Bible says, and I will heed the Bible in all other
things. But, fear not lord cigarette, you are the one thing I will never forsake all the days
of my life. Yes, I will be unfaithful to you at times when I try to quit you, but don’t
worry, I’ll come back to you.
Yes lord cigarette, my body and my soul are yours.
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